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Okay, folks. Most of you really aren't worth my time, but fuck it. I can't walk at the moment, so here it is, an updated version of the Survival Guide. At least, the first part. I'll get to the others if and when I feel like it.
This was originally posted December 27, 1999. Have fun with it. Who knows? Maybe one of you idiot newbies will pay attention and live an extra day or so because of it. HUNTER SURVIVAL GUIDE, INSTALLMENT #1Hunter Fashion TipsDon't stop reading now. Your clothing will help you a lot. It is your camouflage, your protective gear, and the most important thing to be sure you look at. We're going to take it piece by piece. Footwear: Get a pair of steel-toed combat boots or work boots. The combat boots are readily available at any army surplus store, and work boots are available at most shoe stores. These are nondescript, fairly inexpensive footwear that you can easily use for running, hiking, or kicking things. They will help to protect your feet, because a wounded foot will slow you down immensely. I know this sounds stupid, but wear socks. If you must wear them dirty, do it. If you expect to have to operate continuously for a couple of days, or in wet environments such as a swamp, cover your feet in petroleum jelly, to keep your feet from acquiring fungi. Motorcycle boots and cowboy boots will also provide superior protection, but are hard to run in, and will serious decrease your chances of sneaking up on your target. By the same token, you can run better in sneakers, but they provide less foot protection. Pants: Don't wear shorts. I recommend either heavy jeans or work pants, or, if you're feeling up to it, BDUs. These will protect you from many minor hazards, such as running through brush or skidding on your knees. Be aware, though, that denim doesn't stretch as well as it could, and if it gets damp, you'll be uncomfortable for a long time. Kneepads, chaps or leather pants will provide superior protection, but tend to stand out in a crowd. Not to mention the problems with wearing leather in general, which I will get to momentarily. Work pants and jeans are so common that they will not stick out in the minds of observers, and black BDU pants aren't too distinctive, either. Blending in with the crowd is one of your best defenses, and don't forget it. Do not wear pants that you cannot move easily in. Be sure you can run, jump and kick if necessary. If your pants are too baggy, they may get caught on corners or provide the enemy with something to grab you by in combat. If they are too tight, you will be unable to move properly. For the ladies, do not wear skirts or dresses while on the hunt, as your legs may become entangled. For males, acquire an athletic cup. A hit to the genitals will take your mind off the target for a few crucial seconds, and will severely reduce your fighting spirit. Realize that a hit will still hurt, but a cup will take the edge off. Really. Shirts and Jackets: Weather permitting, wear long sleeved shirts whenever possible. These will also serve to protect your arms from hazards like brush, and the sleeves can be ripped off to create an emergency pressure bandage. Again, be sure you can move freely and access all of your weapons quickly. Get rid of all emblematic apparel, as this is another fact that can be used to identify you. Plain shirts all around. Work shirts and flannel shirts serve well, I find. A shirt is something that you will have to get rid of after every hunt, so be forewarned. Avoid ties, as they can be used against you. For jackets, be sure that the weather permits them. Wearing a trench coat in July in Southern California will attract attention, whereas it would not in November in Washington. Many of you like to conceal weapons beneath your coats, so make sure that the coat is large enough not to give away a bulge. If you cannot move freely in your coat, ditch it when the fighting starts. A trench coat or raincoat is wonderful for concealing weapons and looking cool (e.g. The Matrix, Blade), but can often get caught or grabbed in combat. If you are carrying weapons, don't take off your jacket and reveal them. Oh, and for those of you completely lacking in common sense, while a trench coat can conceal your swords and shotguns and whatnot, do not think that this means you can carry this gear all the time. You will give yourself away. Ignore Highlander. Please. Gloves: Get a pair of gloves. Never touch your weapons or munitions without gloves on. Beware of drinking glasses, as they can be used to acquire your fingerprints. If you must, handle glasses with a napkin. Leather gloves are good for protecting your hands, weather permitting. Disposable surgical gloves are useful, particularly in field medicine, but retain your fingerprints after they are disposed of. Cotton or wool gloves tend to not have that good a grip, so avoid them unless all other options are exhausted. Be aware that wearing gloves for a long time can be uncomfortable, so practice. Practice handling and loading your weapons while wearing gloves. Practice as many tasks as you can while wearing gloves, so that you will be able to do anything that comes up. Be sure that your gloves fit well, and be aware that you will lose some degree of manual dexterity and tactile sensitivity. Never go without while hunting. Headgear and Hair: Do not wear your hair long. It gives the enemy something to grab, and has no functional value. Wear your hair short enough so that it does not get into your eyes during combat. Hair can be worn to the collar in back, as it can provide extra protection to the back of your neck. A helmet or hardhat may be useful in protecting your head; it will not be a viable option in all situations. Know when you can use it and when you can't. Helmets should not be worn in an urban combat situation, because that will definitely call attention to you. Safety glasses are also good, just in case. These are available at most hardware stores. Also, carry a dust mask, or a handkerchief, to filter out the worst of smells. When dealing with rotting corpses, it can be a necessity. Wearing both of these will also make it difficult to identify you. A watchcap or beanie will also help to deter identification. Never wear a hat with any kind of emblem on it. Make sure that your hat or helmet will not come loose, because the authorities will be able to identify hairs from it. Armor: Only wear armor if absolutely necessary, or when hunting in an area where you do not expect the authorities. Body armor is pretty incriminating, and if not necessarily illegal, raises a few eyebrows. Some army surplus stores carry Kevlar and other types of body armor, and that is where I got mine. It's expensive, but it will keep bullets from going through you. Body armor can also be acquired through mail order. Chain mail is fairly simple to make, but is very time consuming, heavy, and is not at all stealthy. A leather jacket, while not very protective, is slightly better than nothing, fairly inconspicuous, and completely legal. Of course, on the down side, anything you hunt in will get damaged, and a leather jacket can be almost as expensive as actual body armor. Not to mention the problems with DNA evidence from the jacket can be used to nail you. Above all, you are probably going to have to improvise on this one. Never count on armor to stop anything, though. Your best defense is not to get hit. Even with a bulletproof vest, you will get cracked ribs and bruises at a minimum. Some weapons can even penetrate Kevlar, so be careful. General Tips: Don't carry a wallet with identification while on the hunt. If you drop it, they can find you. Be sure you don't stand out from the crowd too much. Be a wolf in sheep's clothing. Be sure that your weapons are hard to spot. If you must "dress up" in order to strike at a target at a club or formal dinner, for example, try to conform to general guidelines: Be able to move. Be sure all weapons are concealed. Don't go too flashy, and draw attention to yourself. Be sure to carry gloves. Remember, above all, take precautions against identification. Additionally, realize that everything you wear is potentially evidence. Both the police and the targets may attempt to trace you, and that includes fibers from your clothing and hairs. Be careful out there. If anyone else has any tips for the fashion conscious hunter, feel free to post them. If anyone wants to disagree on any of my points, please post them. This is here to help. Use it as you will. The Student (Student32's email is thestudent32@hotmail.com however, since the character is dead, this is OOC only.) |